5 Insecurities About the Past You NEED to Let Go of Right Now
Is your life pretty good for the most part, yet you constantly doubt people or yourself?
Do your insecurities often tamper with your relationships or prevent you achieving some of your goals?
(Riverdale via The CW)
You may not even realize it, but holding on to the past can affect your every move. If you don't purge old feelings and regrets, you're never going to move forward and live your best life. The person you were even a year ago isn't the person you are today.
If you feel like you're living with self-doubt and regret, keep reading for five past insecurities you need to let go of in your journey to true happiness.
Your Dating History
Did you used to date a total jerk? A major geek? A person who's considered unattractive by your peers? Someone who cheated on you or made you feel anything short of amazing? Anyone you've been involved with who left you feeling ashamed of the relationship doesn't matter anymore.
When our dating history is minimal, we tend to think these exes (or whatever they are) define us, but listen, we'll tell you firsthand that you're going to date/kiss/crush on so many people in your life. Just you wait until your college roommate bursts into your dorm from a party and laughs hysterically about who she "accidentally" locked lips with that night. People grow and tastes change over time. It's perfectly normal to be into someone during a particular time, only to be repulsed by them later on.
Just because you may have settled in the past doesn't mean you should let that prevent you from reaching for someone better your next time around. As long as you let your smiley, confident self shine, you can attract anyone. But telling yourself you're not worthy of someone will give them that same idea.
Your Popularity Status
If your social status used to suffer (whether because you were considered a mean girl or deemed "not cool"), it's easy to hold on to feelings of isolation and rejection. When you come from a place of formerly not being well-liked, your natural instinct is to assume people won't be fond of you moving forward. It's easy to doubt anyone who thinks you're funny, pretty, or—heck—cool.
But, again, people evolve over time, and just because you went through an awkward phase (or whatever you want to call it), doesn't mean you have to stay that way forever. Accept your uncomfortable past, and move on.
(Riverdale via The CW)
Your Weight
This one's a toughie, because having a weight issue is not only a physical insecurity, but it can take you over mentally and emotionally as well. Even if you get over your weight struggle, it's common to continue putting yourself in the mindset of the girl you used to be.
Although this issue can take over people's worlds, once you're in a better place, take a look in the mirror and remind yourself of who you are today. Not only do you have the strength to overcome certain issues, but you're beautiful, too. Constantly harping on what you used to look like, how you used to feel about yourself or how someone used to make fun of you won't let people see the truly beautiful, confident you.
Your Upbringing
The people who raise us have an enormous effect on who we grow up to be. Some of us are lucky, surrounded by positive role models in comfortable living environments. Others of us may not have the best upbringings.
It's easy to hold on to the values of someone who raised you, positive or not, but guess what? You are your own person. Living your life based on the way you were treated as a kid is going to put you on the same path as the person you look down upon. Although some people have it easier than others, you have every opportunity to get a job, date the right people and take good care of your body—proving to yourself and others that just because you may not have been raised the way you deserved to be, you care enough about yourself to do your very best.
(Riverdale via The CW)
Your Mistakes
Were you a former troublemaker? Do you have a bit of a dent on your behavioral record? Was there an incriminating rumor at school about you?
Reiterating the sections above: people change. If you keep viewing yourself as the girl who did this or the girl who's known for that, your self-doubt will seep through your pores for everyone to see. But if you want to be forgiven and have your so-called "mistakes" forgotten, then first and foremost, you've got to forgive yourself. Once you do that, don't be surprised to find yourself in a positive mindset, walking around with a confidence that the people around you will pick up on, too.
(Riverdale via The CW)
If you don't believe insecurities can affect your relationships, click HERE to find out how one of our writers lost a close friend because of her self-esteem issues.